Retaining New Parents: The Key Lies in the Return-to-Work Phase

When it comes to parental leave, public attention often focuses on the duration and necessity of the leave. However, after welcoming or adopting a newborn, there is another transition period that deserves equal attention: returning to the workplace.

In fact, many parents, especially birthing parents, often decide not to return to the workforce. In February 2020, a survey conducted by LinkedIn and Censuswide showed that nearly half of mothers chose to extend their leave after giving birth, with an average duration of about two years. Among those who did return to work after leave, more than half said they did not return voluntarily, with financial pressure being the main factor driving this decision. The three career-related concerns that followed included: fear of losing their job, fear of being passed over for promotion, and fear of becoming irrelevant in their careers.

These results reflect the inner conflict of returning parents, especially mothers: they must weigh physical recovery, adapting to a new role, sleep deprivation, and guilt over shifting attention away from their children, while also longing to return to normalcy and resume professional activities. This phase is crucial for companies—if handled well, it can both demonstrate their cultural values and retain valuable talent for years to come.

Embracing the new identity of parents

The workplace's shift in mindset toward new parents should begin long before they return to work. Gina Nebesar, Chief Product Officer at family benefits platform Ovia Health, told HR Dive that, based on data collected by Ovia, many people decide whether to return to work after childbirth as early as the first trimester. She noted that pregnant employees will "look around their organization, trying to find examples of leaders who have the flexibility and work-life balance they desire, especially from the perspective of the postpartum experience." If they hadn't noticed before, pregnant employees will pay special attention to how parents are treated in the workplace.

Management's reaction to the pregnancy news may be the first signal. Nebesar said of Ovia's practices in its own workplace and with partner employers: "We invest a lot in cultural training and manager training." Ovia's training provides managers with tools to connect employees with parenting resources and support, while also covering sensitivity training that managers sometimes lack, "so that when someone says 'I'm pregnant,' the first thing out of your mouth is 'Congratulations.'"

Nebesar emphasized that employers need to understand or remember that "becoming a parent is an overnight identity shift"—and this shift becomes more difficult when employees don't see systems or norms that support them, or even hear recognition from colleagues and management of this major life change.

Melissa Wirt, CEO and founder of Latched Mama and mother of six, echoed the same point. "After pregnancy and childbirth, you are not the same person, whether it's your first child or your sixth... It teaches you immeasurable things," she said. "You change completely as a person, as a mother, but you also change as an employee."

The "boot camp" experience of caring for a newborn brings new and different skills to both birthing and non-birthing parents—skills that, if recognized by employers, will benefit the company. From project management skills honed by remembering feeding schedules and tracking a child's growth, to emotional skills deepened through practicing patience, parents bring immense value.

"I think we need to highlight the skills and strengths that (new parents) develop, while also recognizing that they are new people—changed individuals," Wirt said.

Making the most of flexibility

For HR departments and managers, the period after an employee returns from leave is the perfect time to deliver on the company's promises regarding flexibility and culture. Nebesar said that having discussions about pregnancy, parental leave, and the forms returning to work might take is a good starting point.

After returning, employees working from home may have their baby nearby part or all of the time, making breastfeeding part of the workday. Many employees returning to the office will choose to pump, which requires access to a clean, private space multiple times a day. Despite legal requirements, lactation discrimination is reportedly still common, especially in male-dominated industries. In a survey by the Center for Worklife Law, some participants described humiliating experiences, such as pumping in bathroom stalls or leaking through their shirts because they weren't allowed time or space to pump.

Providing a clean, private space is just the starting point. But employers can go beyond legal requirements by ensuring lactation rooms are equipped with comfortable or even luxurious amenities, making employees feel encouraged to use them. Even small details can make a difference; for example, Google reportedly placed whiteboards in lactation rooms where employees could leave messages for each other or post baby photos, while The Intercept has artwork on the walls, suggesting the space is meant to be enjoyed. Some workplaces also offer magazines or a television.

Beyond providing space—or allowing breastfeeding parents working from home to turn off cameras during meetings—Nebesar said that encouraging employees to block off time on their calendars to signal that pumping is important and uninterrupted time can reinforce an employer's respect for new parents. She began using time blocking to show that "this is something to celebrate—you can't interrupt it."

Flexible hours are another way to help returning employees adjust. Some companies allow a gradual return to the workplace; for example, Zillow allows returning employees to work 60% to 80% of full-time hours for the first few weeks. Nebesar emphasized that flexibility is important not only for office workers but also for frontline employees. Employers can ensure hourly workers have flexible time for medical appointments, help them set schedules in advance, and offer other options, even if employees must be on-site for fixed hours.

Beyond flexibility, Ovia also strongly promotes other benefits for working parents, providing a blueprint for other employers. Nebesar suggests offering financial support to help parents afford childcare costs or a "baby bonus," a stipend to help parents manage expenses during parental leave. Employers can also contract with various specialists: lactation consultants, mental health coaches, baby sleep consultants, and more.

As with all benefits, if employees see leaders using them, they are more likely to use them. If the workplace has paternity leave, but no male leaders seem to have taken it, junior employees may also hesitate to use it. HR can help by encouraging the use of leave from the top down and pointing out the benefits of doing so.

Considering bringing kids to work

While employers can make great strides in fostering a culture that embraces parents and providing useful resources, another external factor may play a significant role in parents' decisions: the severe childcare shortage. An October report from The New York Times found that low wages and stringent regulations have driven many childcare providers to change careers. There are now 100,000 fewer childcare workers than before the pandemic, leaving many parents with no choice but to take on all caregiving responsibilities.

While this is a larger undertaking, employers can also help here. Wirt's startup, located in the suburbs of Richmond, Virginia, has about 50 employees and a "bring your baby to work" policy, allowing employees to bring infants to the office. "Most kids stay here until about 18 months," she said. This decision stemmed from Wirt's own experience. "It was the only way I could function when my brand started growing," she said. At the time, she had a 6-month-old and an 18-month-old. "When I started expanding the brand and my team, I realized it wouldn't be fair if I brought my kids to work but didn't allow other moms the same opportunity."

Wirt said that at the Latched Mama office, there are typically 1 to 11 children each day—napping with or next to their parents, or for more active toddlers, playing in a play area while a parent supervises nearby and works. This policy may sound unusual, but Latched Mama is not the only company inviting children into the office. For those who view her with skepticism, Wirt said: "Sometimes I just want to look at them and say, 'Look at our balance sheet. Look at what we've accomplished.' Many businesses fail in their early stages, and we haven't. I will say it until I'm blue in the face: it's because I valued a group of people that society overlooks."

Some companies have also explored or adopted on-site childcare, including Patagonia and Goldman Sachs. However, unlike other benefits or strategies employers might offer, on-site childcare often comes with heavy regulatory paperwork and insurance costs—making extended leave or access to lactation consultants a more feasible option.

In 2021, Colorado passed a law aimed at reducing barriers to workplace childcare. The bill, SB21-236, allocated over $8 million for an employer childcare facility grant program, in addition to funding for other early childcare and education programs. This legislation is beginning to show results; the Steamboat Ski Resort in Steamboat Springs will open an employee childcare center this month, supported by the program.

On-site childcare may be at the forefront of the movement to embrace parent employees, but companies can still take many steps to ease the transition for employees returning to work after parental leave. Most importantly, it starts with the simple act of understanding the experiences of expectant and postpartum parents and asking them what they need. "When you embrace an employee as a whole person, that's a beautiful thing," Wirt said, "not just the person who shows up from nine to five."